Jamie's Blog

Just Another Dumb Email Exchange

November 9, 2012.

So, this is not the first time I am just using an email exchange as a blog post, and I am sure it will not be the last.  In my defense I can not really do this email exchange justice in 140 characters or less on Twitter, or post it as a status update on Facebook.  Just today I got a few more emails that may turn into an amusing (or frustrating) exchange.  One such email encouraged me to purchase more hats for my hat store, another invited me to a Carpet Expo in Germany and lastly an email that asked me to blog about....diapers.

So, here is my latest email exchange that is too long for a story at a cocktail party and too ridiculous not to share:

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On Sun, Sep 23, 2012 at 10:00 PM

Hi Jamie,

I came across your website and wanted to notify you about a broken link on your page in case you weren't aware of it. The link on http://svmomblog.typepad.com/silicon_valley_moms_blog/2007/11/boo---halloween.html which links tohttp://www.fema.gov/areyouready is no longer working. I've included a link to a useful page on Creating an Emergency Plan that you could replace the broken link with if you're interested in updating your website. Thanks for providing a great resource!

Link: http://www.publicadministration.net/resources/creating-an-emergency-plan/

Best,
Sue Smith

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Oh wow, I have not thought about the SV Mom blog for quite some time.  I really miss                                       writing for a collaborative Mom Blog that gets tons of traffic (and awesome swag at                                       Blogher). Oh well, was a good experience and I was lucky to have been a part of it.                                                                         I will respondto this woman and try and help her out. --------------------------------------------------------------- On Sun, Sep 23, 2012 at 8:55 AM

Hi Sue,

Thank you for contacting me, however the link you are referencing is not in a post I wrote, and the SV Mom Blog is not my website.  It was owned by Silicon Valley Mom Blogs and I was one of hundreds of contributors.  I don't believe I ever wrote about emergency plans. I believe the correct person to contact is <A SV Mom Blogger>.

Jamie Lentzner

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On Mon, Sep 24, 2012 at 9:01 AM
Hi Jamie,

Thanks for getting back to me!  Would you mind if I ask you to provide me with the email address <A SV Mom Blogger>? I ask so that I might follow up with her directly.

Best,

Sue

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Now when I read this last email I was not paying much attention to detail.   Had it not                                                   been Monday, my husband out of town and only one  cup of coffee in my system I might                                             have noticed that this Sue woman (name changed to protect the crazy) was using a sort                                                of bizarre type of English.  Again, I was not really paying attention to her use or abuse                                        of the English language so I replied. --------------------------------------------------------------------
On Tues, Sep 25, 2012 at 9:05 AM

Hi Sue,

I don't have email addresses for the bloggers that used to write for the collaborative site that I mentioned earlier. Like I mentioned in my last email there were hundreds of bloggers who wrote for Silicon Valley Mom Blog.  Also, all of the links are broken in the post, it was written back in 2007 and the site is no longer an active any blog.

Jamie

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On Tues, Sep 23, 2012 at 9:28 AM

Hi Jamie,

Thanks for letting me know. Have a great day!

Best Regards,

Sue

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Wed, Oct 10, 2012 at 11:03 AM

Hi Jamie,

I wanted to follow up with you and make sure you had received my email I sent a little bit ago regarding the broken link on your site.

If you are still updating your website, I have a similar resource that you can replace the broken link with if you are interested. Let me know!

Best regards,
Sue Smith

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Okay now I am thinking of that damn book I had to read my daughter, If You Give A Mouse A Cookie.  It had this irritating mouse that refused to leave the little boy's home, even when he offered the mouse numerous bribes.  Who is this lady and why is she obsessed with a link from five years ago for a blog that no longer exists?  My husband told me to delete her email and mark her as SPAM, but nooooo I had to reply.

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On Wed, Oct 10, 2012 at 11:09 AM

Hi Sue,

Um, I responded to you and you replied back to me in numerous email exchanges a few weeks ago. Here is a more detailed answer for you to hopefully understand why I can’t fix the link you referenced in the last two emails:

Silicon Valley Mom Blog no longer exists.  The post was written in 2007. The site closed down and Technoratti took over the site.   After further investigation I have found almost all of the blogs have broken links or have been removed from the internet.  

Like I mentioned earlier, the actual blog post you contacted me about was not written by me, it was written by a woman named <A SV Mom Blogger>.  

By the way you responded to all of my emails and confirmed you got them.

Jamie Lentzner

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On Mon, Oct 15, 2012 at 3:08 PM

Hi Jamie,

Thanks for letting me know. Have a great day!

Best Regards,

Sue

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See, that all worked out fine.  I was being nice and helping out a woman that was just trying to do her job.  I am sure that answered all of her questions and concerns regarding the links.  I have washed my hands of the situation.  Wait did she just use the same cut and paste response to my last email?

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On Wed, Nov 7, 2012 at 11:29 AM

Hi Jamie,

I've reported a broken link on your site http://svmomblog.typepad.com/silicon_valley_moms_blog/2007/11/boo---halloween.htmlthat links to http://www.fema.gov/areyouready and haven't heard back, so I just wanted to verify whether you're the right person to contact? If not, could you direct me to the person maintaining the website? If you would be interested in updating your website, I have a similar resource that you are more than welcome to use to update. Let me know!

Link Replacement Option: http://www.publicadministration.net/resources/creating-an-emergency-plan/

Best,
Sue Smith

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OMG! It is not bad enough that I just lived through the longest election cycle of my lifetime and now this.  Is this really happening to me again?  I am so living my own personal Ground Hog Day moment.  Is this woman insane? Is she on drugs or drunk?  How could she not understand my detailed responses??  I may be a tad cranky after staying up last night to see the concession and acceptance speech, but….is she kidding? 

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On Wed, Nov 7, 2012 at 11:44 AM

Sue (if that is even your real name),

I have answered your ridiculous emails and you have replied to my responses numerous times.  You are seriously wasting my time.  I don’t know why I keep responding but I do.  So here it goes….again:

Please see below the ENTIRE stream of our conversations all pasted together and all of YOUR responses to each of my emails.  Please stop sending me repeated emails asking me to fix a link from a blog post from 2007 that, wait for it…..I DID NOT WRITE! 

Best of luck to you,

Jamie Lentzner

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She has yet to respond to my last email, but I am optimistic that Sue will not let me down.  I am confident that I will have an email waiting for me in my inbox soon....just like Ground Hog Day. 

Oh, We Did Not Steal Your Sign....Um, Okay?

October 17, 2012.

To steal from one person is theft.  To steal from many is taxation.

                                                                                                                ~Daielle’s Law (take off of Felson’s Law)

It is interesting to me how most things in my life always come full circle.  When bad things happen I am sort of not surprised – I usually see it coming.  I think we all have this sort of inane sixth sense, especially women.  I have found this helpful with almost 99% of the times my children have gotten in….ahem, trouble or had an emotional breakdown.  It is like when my husband is stressed with work, the tension and electricity in the air is different.  The calm of our household is all screwed up and I can sense it going to boil over at some point.  I do not think I am special or psychic (but don’t tell my children that), I just think that I can tell when things are not right.

It’s Friday, Friday, Gotta Get Down On Friday

My husband and I decided to go out for a few drinks with some good friends this past Friday.  The local watering hole (I am being kind, it is a bar) was close by and we could leave our four children at home for a short time.  After ordering the kids a pizza we headed out.  It is not a fancy place, but the food and drinks are good and sometimes I get to see a grandmother with a tattoo on her boob do some shots and dance..…but I digress.

We were on a short time frame due to the fact that we had never left our four children alone together and we had the dreaded wonderful soccer games the following morning.  Oh, and the fact that we do not frequent bars that often, we were all watching our watches.  After an hour, a few drinks & a delicious plate of hot wings, my husband mentioned our neighbors were there.  And by neighbors I mean the Tea Party Lady who said, “I am sort of a big deal, yet can’t wear a bra” neighbor.  He (not me) sent them over drinks and they waved him over.  Here is how the conversation started and deteriorated without me (shocking I know):

“Thanks for the drinks”, Tea Party Neighbors said

Darin, “You are welcome”.

“You know when you put up that sign I said to my husband, I like our neighbors and all but how could they?  How could they dare put up that sign?  I was just shocked….” Tea Party Wife

Darin,“ You put up a Mitt Romney sign. Why can’t we put up an Obama sign?  And for the record,  I do not trust Romney.”

Tea Party Neighbor, “I don’t like Romney, but I can NOT vote for a Muslim.”

Silence……Darin smiled and walked away.  You can not fight with stupid.

And Then That (sort of) Happened Again

Darin walked back to our table and tried to explain what had just happened to him.  I was still mid-speech/sputter/laughter as he described our neighbors to our friends (and to note I have NO idea their political affiliation), and then this happened…..  from the corner of my eye I could see my neighbors approaching our table.  Being a non-paid expert on drunks, I observed my neighbor moving from side to side, while her glass of wine(that we paid for) precariously sloshing out of her glass.  When she approached our table, she thanked us for the drinks….and then this happened;

“So, thank you for the drinks….” Tea Party Neighbor slurred as she sloshed wine from side to side.

“You are welcome.  We are neighbors.” Darin said

Her husband stood behind her and she looked me in the eye and said, “You know I can’t vote for a Muslim, but I can vote for a Mormon.  Oh, I did not steal your sign by the way.”

I am not sure if I am proud or sad, but I was speechless.  I said nothing.  I mean, ask my High School friends, I am not one to be in a fight with – I say something sarcastic then duck when punches are thrown.  Her lack of education and the fact that President Obama is an a African American & a Christian is probably not going to change her mind. And, if I may - I would vote for him even if he was Muslim.....crazy woman please!  As her husband dragged/pushed her out of the bar without uttering a word I just stared at them.  But I also started to add up my own statistics on the 2012 Election.

If My Campaign was Dictated by Facts:

• I never told my neighbor our sign was stolen
• We replaced it within 12 hours
• I will never let my husband buy possibly hostile neighbors cocktails again
• President Obama is NOT a Muslim, he is a Christian….but if he was Muslim it would not matter
• I need a “I am Kind of Big Deal” T-Shirt

Never Trust a Woman who Doesn’t Wear A Bra

At the end of the day I am super (as is my husband) proud that I did not say anything to this woman.  For once I am thinking that silence is the best enemy.  I mean, she pretty much became the punch line of every story I told all weekend, and every day until Election day approaches, the story I will keep telling.  

She will continue to be the butt of all my jokes as October turns into November.  I would like to know when the Freedom of Speech became a joke or reason to ridicule neighbors or individuals that live near you acceptable?  Did I miss something in History? Was I asleep in Civics?  I was a straight A student in English & History, unless there was some Math test snuck in.  When did it NOT become OK to put up a political sign? 

Now as I write this the Lentzner Militia is in full effect.  My children have trained the dogs to sit by the front door and bark if someone as much as looks at our house.  Our front light is left on all night day long.  We expect our new (Bigger) sign to be stolen, but if it is, we won’t go down not trying to catch the thief.  In fact, just today my daughter overheard a heated discussion on the junior high playground that made her pause and listen;

“I would vote Romney.” So said a girl

“Not me, I am voting for Obama.” Said, a boy.

“Obama is going to LOSE!” Said, a random boy & a girl.

Abby was quite upset by the conversation, but smart enough to realize these children were NOT old enough to vote (she is sort of smart like that).  Not the conversation by content, but by the fact that she felt she could not volunteer her opinion.  She was silenced, by her fear of what her oppinion would have done to the conversation.  She kept the fact that her family had an Obama sign to herself and walked away - which is sad in so many ways.  It is 2012 for Christ's Sake!   To the haters I have my own quote, my kids and I put it all together on our own;

The thought that every vote counts is not always true.   To our and neighbor who thinks our President is a Muslim….get an Education and stop letting your bigotry dictate your uneducated vote - he is Christian.  You are angry because the world you once lived in has changed. Deal with it.  Don’t lash out at those that have nothing to do with your hatred.  The world is changing.  Stealing a Political sign does nothing to push your agenda forward – it pushes it backwards.  Your hatred angers the opposition and especially their children.  Be careful what you do, our my children are watching.

                                                                                            ~ Jamie Risdon Lentzner (I’m kind of a big deal….)

Red Solo....Balloon

September 17, 2012.

A couple of months ago my daughter turned ten and I had (what I thought was) a great idea to have a "Wipe Out" Birthday Party.  For the first time ever we had a pool and how fun would it be watch ten year old girls hurl themselves at big red balls in my pool?  If you are not familiar with the Wipe Out TV Game show it is basically an obstacle course where grown adults make complete fools of themselves jumping into a Rube Goldberg Machines.  My kids love watching the show, I cringe and cover my eyes worrying about things like health care, hospital visits, broken bones & dental surgeries.

So as the party grew closer a few things were very apparent:

1. Most of her friends were on vacation 
2. I had no idea how to turn my pool/backyard into a Wipe Out worthy obstacle course
3. My daughter had no desire to help me with the planning of the party

The Awesome Idea

We already had a number of large colored beach & yoga balls to jump on in the pool and I figured we could use those, rafts, noodles and such for an obstacle course.   However I was totally stumped how to make it "look" like the Wipe Out Game Show.  I was talking to a creative friend and she suggested getting big red round balloons and tying them to rocks and putting them in the center of the pool.  Three big red ones - like the TV show.  Abby even liked the idea - we would just tie them an anchor and put them in the pool....ya, great idea.

I had waited too long to order them online so I headed to Party City (you remember Party City right?  The company that used my home for a commercial in 2011).  Of course the red balloons were not in one package - no problem, I just purchased the 3 packages of 9 36 inch balloons....ya balloons that would/could be 3 feet in circumfrance when blown up to capacity.  Then, I made the amazing stupid decision to get 9 of them (3 red of course, 3 blue & 3 yellow) filled with helium.  

I assumed (wrongly) they would never fill them up that big.  I aslo told the cashier I had never purchased these before.  He said nothing, made no indicuation that these balloons would be overly extra humungous.  Nothing.  He just took my money and off we went.

The Dreaded Party Day

The day of the party came and we had a sort of loose idea of what the obstacle course would look like.  My daughter and I headed to Party City to collect our balloons.   I asked the woman behind the counter where were our balloons and handed her my receipt. She asked me if I saw them anywhere, I looked around and said  no.  Then Abby turned around and pointed to the ceiling.  This is what we saw:

My first sign that this may not turn out well should have been when the cashier started laughing hysterically  when she saw the size of my car - it is a medium sized SUV at best.  She then started babbling about how people (not me) would rent vans, trucks or even special vehicles to transport these super large over sized balloons to parties.  Me, with no laughing or sene of humor at this point asked why no one mentioned this to me.  Her response was to just giggle and ask if I had a convertible....ya, no.

Red Balloon Experiment #1

We were able to place shove one of the monstrocity of balloons in the back of my SUV, then while trying to put shove another one in, it popped (synch my ten year old starts to do a very quiet whimper).  We then left the store with just one balloon and told the woman  I would be back for the others.  I first tried to see if a friend could pick up the other baloons, but realized she did not own a van, semi or a motor home so that would not work.  About half way home I had the brilliant idiotic idea that since I had a sun room we could drive home with the  balloons out the top of the sun roof.

Red Balloon Experiment #2

I left my daughter in the car and marched into Party City to get my other (seven, minus the one I popped) balloons.  I grabbed 3 small floats and marched out the door, first knocking over a display of candy and almsot taking out a guy in a wife beater tank top (yeah me).  Right out the front door the first balloon popped for no reason other than....it was FILLED WITH MOST LIKELY TOO MUCH HELIUM.  I then tried not to fly away as I brought the balloons over to my daughter.  She took the remaining two and I went back in the store for two more. 

As I struggled with two more balloons I noticed that Abby had only one balloon ( if you are doing the math that is 3 balloons down) and she was crying...and she wasd crying hard.  The closer I got to the car I realized she was not only crying but she was yelling, "NOOOOO more!"  "No more balloons!".  I tried to calm her down and give her the two balloons I had - she would have nothing of it.  "NOOOOOOOOO  MOOOORE BALLLOOONSSS!" She yelled between tears, snot and hiccups.  I had a little tantrum of my own and sort of forced her to hold the last two balloons and we headed home.

So, now we have three 3 foot x 3 foot balloons poking out the roof of my SUV....sort of looking like the house from Up, had the old cranky guy owned a car - I am clearly playing the old cranky guy at this point.  Abby is holding on to these three balloons and I am sweating.  I slowly pulled out of our parking spot and the first balloon popped (that would be 4th balloon down).  At this point Abby started crying and screaming, "My birthday is ruined!  My birthday is ruined!".  I being the cool minded and totally in control Mom start (not proud) yelling as I realize we are not going to get home with any...BANG!....another balloon popped.  The tears and the yelling (Abby not me) are at the point of no return...she starts hyperventalating about the damn balloons (mind you we are not even out of the parking lot yet).  I keep driving slowly around the corner and as I drive over a speed bump, BANG! the third balloon pops.

Red Solo Balloon

I am not a mathemetician but I am doing the math in my head and realize that we have one balloon in he car, we have popped 4 and the chances of this one balloon making it to the party are slim at best.  Abby has stopped crying but is seriously hiccupping and moaning about how her party is ruined.  I try as best as I can to calm her as I clutch the steering wheel, freaking out about my "obstacle course" that will not be.

We pulled into the driveway and I opened the back of my SUV.  I slowly started to pull the one red balloon out of the back of my car.  If I did not mention before it is like a 10o degrees and I am sweating.  I slowly pull the one lone balloon out of my car and.......wait for it....BANG! it pops.

Balloons 5 - Mom 0.  Epic fail on my part.

 

 

 

To Trade Show or To Not

July 23, 2012.

I have had no motivation to blog lately.  I have been overwhelmed with....well life.  I have been spending my summer swimming, playing, staying up late, going to camp, having sleep overs, playing xbox....oh wait, no that is what my kids have been doing.  I  have been entertaining them.  And, as I have mentioned multiple times I was not sure I had anything else left to blog about.  Then out of nowhere I got this email today:

Hi There,

I found your blog about Gift Shows and wanted to ask you a question. What are the good gift shows on the West Coast? I just moved from Oregon to Los Angeles and my business has really been taking off over the last couple of years. I'm now thinking about doing a gift show and would love to know what you think. Also, I'd love to visit the LA gift show (I want to "walk" a show to see what's what!)

Thanks for any thoughts you can share!

:) Sarah Jane

Life is Rosey

Trade Shows in General

In no way do I consider myself an expert in attending and exhibiting at Trade Shows.  However, I have been doing it (and by it I mean running a business) for ten....ya, ten years this November.  A little background for ya, I have walked shows in San Francisco, Surtex, NY Stationary Show,  Los Angeles, Atlanta, Long Beach & New York multiple times and multiple years.  I have had my products in Show Rooms in Los Angeles, Minneapolis & Texas.  I have exhibited at the ABC Kids Expo and the Atlanta Gift show multiple times.

If I was asked to do a word association about Trade Shows, I would blurt out....expensive.  And to then to answer your question about if there were any good Gift Shows,  I would yell out, "NOOOOOOOOOONNNE!"  just like the guy that yells "GOOOOAAAAALLLLL!" after a soccer player scores.  Harsh? Yes.  Do I speak from experience? Yes.  

I would love to sugar coat this post and say that Trade Shows are good, but I can't.  I loathe them. They are a total suck of money and they are unnecessary.  In this day of Facebook, Pinterest, Etsy, the Internet, Groupon, Plum District and Oprah - no one has to do a Trade Show.  The waste of money is one thing, but the waste of time is painful.  Sitting in a booth day after day for 10 hours a day, away from your family and writing itsy bitsy orders - the opposite of priceless, it sucks.

The Cost Can Be More Than Expected

You need cash to exhibit, and lots of it.  Think of just flights, hotels & food.  That does not even include the renting of the booth, the samples of your products, the employees that will help you man the booth, printing of catalogs, postcards, order forms, giveaways, the possible advertisements in Trade Rags and then the super fun (sarcasm here) hidden costs.  Shipping your products, unloading your products by union workers, boxing up your products....it is kind of like when some contractor says, "Wanna do a remodel?  Take your budget and then double it!"

When Jamie's Painting & Design exhibited at the ABC Kid's Expo years ago we spent $10,000.00.  The two shows I did in Atlanta cost, um a lot of money too.  For the record my average wholesale price of one of my products is $17.50 to $22.00.  Do the math on how many products I have to sell to make up a $10,000.00 bill.

 The Cost of Exhibiting at a Trade Show

The expression, "Do as I say, Not as I did" should be the actual title of this post.  If I knew then, what I knew now - I would not have exhibited.  Instead I will list what I found on the LA Gift Fair's website and these are the minimum costs if I were to go to the show:

 Los Angeles Trade Show

• Shipping or Unloading Products (changes with each venue, taxes, Union Workers) : N/A
• Displays : ( $500 to $5000 depending on sophistication of booth) : $500.00
• Booth 10 x 10 Booth $20.00/sq. ft. (this includes 1 trash can, 1 chair and black curtain & rod) : $2000.00
• Hotel (4 nights for show + 1 to set up booth)  $139.00 to $189.00 a night (tax $20.85 a night) : $799.25
• Hotel Parking $20.00 daily parking : $100.00
• Car Rental is $50.00 a day : $250.00
• Food $55.00 to $70.00 a day (cost of food is expensive at the show) : $275.00
• Flight on Alaskan Airlines : $160.00

Total Cost before I even ship my products, print brochures or write ONE order : $2,284.25

From what I have heard the Los Angeles Show is not what it used to be.  With the San Francisco Gift Show gone, it may attract more buyers - but talk on the street is not good.  When I was at the Gift Mart years ago I was not impressed, nor did I get many sales when I was in a show room there.  It could have been my product or the show room - but it was not very profitable for the cost I spent (you have to pay sales reps a % of your sales, plus you may pay a fee to have your products in their showroom).

Even if you are super convinced to do a Trade Show, you have to do a reality check first and ask yourself a number of questions:

• How much money can you afford to lose? 
• What is your budget?
• How many other vendors with similar (or the exact) product will be at the show?
• Does your product appeal to a large demographics across the country? 
• Can you find out who exhibited last year?  
• Have you done research on blogs to see if the show was worth it?  
• Do you enjoy "selling" your product and yourself?

You Still Want to Do A Trade Show

If you are thinking of exhibiting a Trade Show I highly recommend walking the show first, heck even consider walking it with the idea of finding sales.  I once made an appointment with 4 different stores in the New Jersey/New York area and met up with them (accidentally) in front of a competitor's booth.  If she was not such a nasty person, I would not mention this - because again, it was by accident.  

Walking a show (you can do this free if you talk your way in and tell them you are a buyer) can be lonely and even boring.  It is hard to get people to talk when they are there to sell.   Be brave, be friendly and talk yourself up something special.  Also, travel with a friend, it makes you braver and gives you someone to laugh with when things do not work out as expected.   Trade Show attendance and exhibition has been going down for years, especially since that super fun Recession of 2008.  

What to Do Instead

There are other ways to get your product to market without spending a ton of money on a Trade Show.  Search out stores, catalogs and websites on line.  Sending emails is the best form these days, but back in the day I would send a catalog via snail mail.  If you cannot find the contact information from an average Google search, try Linked In.  

Another thing to consider doing a smaller more intimate show locally instead of a large Trade Show. An Art & Wine festival, a mini-boutique at a school or a Holiday Boutique or Craft Fair are exellent "starter" shows for you.   The difference is you need inventory for these, vs. just take orders at a Trade Show.  You will find out real quick if you enjoy sitting in a booth and talking to potential customers. Plan on going in with a very, very thick skin, because people will may some cruel things about your products.  

Be patient and persistent, it takes a long time to get established.  Take every small and large accomplishment with strides.  It took me years to get into hundreds of stores, websites and catalogs and sadly with the Recession only a few months for tons of them to go bankrupt. Whatever you do don't give up, keep trying and searching for accounts.  A quote I heard at a funeral earlier this seems fitting way to just to end this post, "Just keep keeping on". 

Places to Research Trade Shows

Las Vegas Market

ABC Kids Expo

Atlanta Gift Show

New York Gift Show

Surtex

New York Stationary Show

LA Gift Show

Posts Where I go On & On About Trade Shows

The Atlanta Gift Show

Preparing to Walk the Atlanta Gift Show

What Not to Do at Trade Show

Craft Boutique Ettiquette

First Trade Show - ABC Kids Expo

Surtex & Stationary Show in New York

Post #2 About Surtex & Stationary Show New York

What other Companies said about the ABC Kids Expo 2008

1st Time Exhibiting in Atlanta 2007

Another 2007 Atlanta Post

Setting up Booth for Trade Show

Trade Show Lingo

Summer 2007 Atlanta Gift Show

Last Days of the Last time I will EVER exhibit at a Trade Show

Regrets from Atlanta Gift Show 

Advertising in print for a Trade Show

Preparing for a Trade Show

 

I Don't Care

May 10, 2012.

I was reading all over the web everyone all a flutter this morning regarding the whole Mom breast
feeding her....I don't know 9  year old son (okay he is almost four.....but still) on the cover of Time Magazine.  I read a lot of comments for and against the photo.  Mother's saying it was beautiful, others saying it was gross - and so goes another ridiculous worthless argument about who is a better mother.  

I even started to get involved in the dialogue and started imagining my post on this attrocity to society.  Ya, but not for or against breast feeding toddlers, because I am more concerned with the poor boy and what he may will go through as he grows older.  I mean, was anyone thinking of that four year old boy being a ten year old, a fourteen year old or a seventeen year old trying to date a girl?  I am sure the "Boob Man" jokes will be making a big pressence tonight on Late Night TV.  That poor kid, he will most likely be ridiculed forever, even when he  just orders a chicken breast.  I seriously was gonna dedicate a whole post to it, and ask my soon to be thirteen year old what he thought.....and then I sighed and said to myself, "I don't care."

Not to sound insensitive or crash - but I don't care.  I don't need to spew my own over-inflated opinion out there (even though the irony that I just did is not lost on me).  I don't need to tweet how for/against/agast I am at the provcative pose she is making on the cover.  It's her life and it is her bed (and her son's bed) that she has to lie in....no pun intended since the story is about that type of parenting.

I Don't Care Anymore

I loved being a part of the Mommy Blogosphere for a few years (even though I detest that word).  It was fun to write for an awesome website that got tons of comments and I liked writing about controversial subjects.  Going to Blogher was amazing, meeting some of my heroes in person was amazing.  Getting all the free food, drinks & silly crap they gave away - all Amazing.  I was all about linking, commenting, blogging and staying up on the stupid Twitter feed.  

Now-a-days, I really have no desire to spend countless hours doing all that any longer.  I still love me some Facebook (and now Pinterest) but I don't want to dedicate that much time to the craft of blogging.  The end result (for me) was not as rewarding as one would have thought.   I loved it at the time.....now, ah I am going to say it, "I don't care".

It's not that I dislike or am jealous of the other bloggers out there - it just does not interest me any longer.  Sort of like battling over breast vs. bottle - those days are long gone and I don't care what anyone (or how) they feed their kids.   Everyone seems so damn sensitive these days if other people do not conform to their ridulous standards.  As long as it does not affect me and my children, "I don't care."

Now, don't get me wrong, I still love to blog/write and I will probably do it till I die, but eh.......not religously, not daily and not for profit.  Unless of course some editor comes a callin' and asks me to write a book or my super duper ever exciting memoir...then okay - I will do it.  But until that fantasy comes to life........I just don't care.

I Used to Care, But Now I Don't

I used to go after press for Jamie's Painting & Design and more importantly Jamie with a vengence.  I was a rapid Mama Grizzly Bear on a mission and I was actually quite good at it.  Maybe not so much good - but I had a good story and most times were at the right place at the right time.  Other than getting into People Magazine and on the Oprah Winfrey Show or in her magazine, I accomplished everything I ever imagined for my business in the eyes of the press corps.  

Also, I am not proud to admit this, but I used to turn green with jealousy when other entrepreneurs in my industry (or just close to it) got awesome press.  I assumed they were showered with sales, celebrity clients and calls from......Oprah of course after they were featured in some magazine.  I would obsess over it and would waste countless hours courting that very magazine that just ran a story similar to mine.....ya, not proud of that.  Eventually it would work out and I would get the press from that magazine, a newspaper, TV show - whatever, it came at some point.  

Again, sticking with the theme of this post, I just don't care anymore.  I mean if it happens that would be great - but I am not in the mood to go out and try to get it with my mouth frothing while I repeat my story for the 45th time to some reporter.  I am more a 'Been There, Done That' kind of girl.  The reason being is most of the press did not put $$$ in my pocket, or even equal sales.  Press did equal more press (which is a whole other post about people only want to write about you if some other reporter already did) but it rarely equaled sales.  I loved me some press, but I could not and can not pay for college bragging about being on Dr. Phil.  So......don't care.

I Could Care Less

I have mentioned many, many times how I kept up on my competition pretty closely for many years.  There are many reasons why I did this and I stand by my choices for doing it.  I really think you (me) need to know what is going on in your industry so that you can stay ahead.  This is especially important when you are a young company and a newbie to your industry.  You can not lay on your laurels - because frankly you don't have any.  

Fast forward to what is coming on our ten year mark this November and well, I guess I will take a peek once in a great while at other companies.  Honestly, most of my competition is gone - that is not me bragging, they just are.  Many, many small companies went away in the Recession or they licensed their work to larger companies.  

Also, the trends in the Children industry have sort of hit a lull in my humble opinion.  There are not exciting color combinations and amazing designs coming out these days.  I remember reading that in a Recession (or Depression) people go back to comfort foods, calm & safe colors and designs.  It makes sense and it made for a boring few years of designing new products.  So, now a days I will keep an eye on some othe companies but I am pretty sure if they develop a new design before I do, it won't be the end fo my company or the world.  I tend not to care if they do or if they don't.

What I Do Care About

I know this post sounded very negative and I yes I am singing that 80's song in my head as I write it, but stay with me.  As much as I enjoyed carying soooo much too much about these distractions in the past, I am glad I don't any longer.  I can focus on my business and my family.  I can spend my time caring about getting out good products and getting them on time to our customers.  I still want our customers to love our products and I still care about making them.

I still get excited about new designs.  Even though it has been two long years since I came out with new designs for my company I have worked on designs for sports teams, schools and various licensing companies.  I care about new partnerships, relationships and promotions with other companies.  I care about new customers (and old ones) instead of my competiton and my presence in the press.     I care about me and my happiness, instead of bending over backwards working 24 hours straight to please a channel partner that won't even pay me on time.  I care about my family and our quality of live instead of my blogs popularity and the number of readers I had last week.

So while the rest of the internet blows up over the latest boobie sighting, I will not be joining the conversation.   I am pretty sure my son's email is blowing up right now with this one photo being shared amongst all teenagers around the country.   I am going to spend the evening with my family and most likely explaining to my son about the dangers of a controversial photo and how it can haunt you....forever.  

February um....Where Did You Go? And can You find March?

March 20, 2012.

I swear I have no idea even where February went, and now March is more than half over.  I feel like Rip Van Winkle and I just woke up from a long winters nap.    I mean, I know what I have been doing and spending all my waking hours on, but it is like Spring already!  How can that possibly be when I am pretty sure that I missed Winter, you know while I was sleeping and all.  But in all seriousness this is a list of sorts of what I have been doing:

Traveling The Globe....actually just the State

I swear I have never traveled this much in such a short time in my life.  I feel like I have been living out of my suit case since around October, with trips back and forth to the Bay Area to trips around the state.  I am not complaining, I just keep singing the OneRepublic song Good Life:

To my friends in New York, I say hello 
My friends in L.A. they don't know 
Where I've been for the past few years or so 
Paris to China to Col-or-ado 

It has not been all fun and exciting jaunts around the country, many trips have been soccer tournaments and a business trip (oh wait...that WAS all fun!).  I have found just packing alone takes a lot of time, and some of it has been time away from my family.  So, with that...blogging took quite a back seat.

Lots of Research & Little Remodeling

We have lived in our  home for a little over seven months, long enough for me to know what I like, what I don't like and what I "OH MY GAWD I can't live with for one more day!".  I won't bore you with the laundry list of remodeling projects, but it has turned into an overwhelmingly long list.  The hiring takes time, the purchasing takes time and more time is invested in convincing my husband to PLEASE help takes even more time.  

But most of my time has been doing research on what, when who and how we will do all these projects.  Not shocking to anyone, but the getting bids alone takes a small village to coordinate with schedules.  I am not one that enjoys that much research.  I kind of, no wait I KNOW what I like and that is all there is.  I am enjoying poking around Pinterest for ideas, but really the site is just a plain time suck until I decide to make a cupcake tower made to look like a Disney Princess.

The other problem I have is I am....wait for it...very impatient.  Everything takes twice as long as expected.  Everything. I have a soft spot for little Ms. Verruca Salt in Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factor, "I want a pony NOW Daddy!"  No, seriously the worst part is waiting and then waiting some more.  I am trying not to get too impatient though....that would be the old me, the one who just started tearing down parts of my house without a plan or a prayer (true story).  

Licensing Art.....Best Part of Being Busy

Most of my time has been spent on this larger than life....well not that big, but still big project.  I mentioned earlier that I met a wonderful woman in Atlanta and came to find out we could collaborate on a project together.  A five minute conversation on the bus to the Atlanta Convention Center has resulted in her signing me to create a large number of product lines for her company.

I designed a line of products for her company, frames, mirrors, wall art, clocks - all new and all very very tough for someone who has beeen working on 6 x8 tiles for the last 9 years.  I think in terms of "Jane's Room" and how can I wrap my designs around the tile.  It took a leap of faith for the company to take a chance on me, but I am super excited too see the final results.  Samples are being made in Shanghai as we speak and I am soon starting another line of products.

Of course with licensing (like I know what I am talking about) these won't be available till 2013, so as excited as I am I need to just sit back and wait and see what happens.  I am optimisitc, but more realistic.  I have listed or blogged more than once things that never came to fruition and almost amazing opportunities.  I have a really good feeling about this opportunity, which means either I am getting less pessamistic or I am too old to worry about it. 

Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but it gets you nowhere. 

                                                                                                                                                        ~Glenn Turner

Word for 2011....was Change

January 5, 2011.

I am not sure if I am happy or sad to see 2011 come to an end.  It has been an amazing year with lots of changes and new experiences, in my personal life and at  Jamie's Painting & Design.  For most of the year I have tried to keep a positive outlook and stiff upper lip and my sense of humor in order.  Not to say some heated discussions, arguments and tears have not found there way into a few of my days, but I am still standing, so all must be good.  

I have bragged for years about how good change is, how I never look back, hate to regret...blah, blah, blah.  Truth is change is hard, change is tough, but change is what I think makes us grow.   No time in my life has the word change been more appropriate than in 2011.  I may not have totally embraced all of the changes of 2011,  I  do remember them:

Downsizing to Success

Five years ago when we moved the business out of my home and into a new location I was beyond stressed to the point of getting sick, heart palpations and my weight below 100 pounds.  The unknown and the employees that were not making the move with us was a lot for me to handle.  Moving the business this time....was much easier.

The stress of paying for all the warehouse and office space was a huge stresser for me.  The fact is that rental space in Northern California (Recession or not) is extremly high and hard on this small business.  Small is the new big these days and I enjoyed it.  I missed seeing my employees as much as I used to, but I learned to use the phone, email and the dreaded texting to communicate.  I also learned the working from home and staying in your robe and slippers during a bad winter storm can be pretty fantastic.

House for Sale Became House Sold 

We sold our first home in 2001 right at the time that the market in the Bay Area became saturated with home sales and the dot com bubble was a popping.  We had to lower our asking price, all of this was going on while my sister was getting married, and we had to deal with a probate sale....again, stress and the dreaded losing of weight.  Selling our home this time was stressful yes......but much easier.

I honestly never thought we would leave our house, I was thinking I would die in that house.  I still wake up every once in awhile looking around my room and singing a verse from Talking Heads song, Once in a Lifetime; You may find yourself in a beautiful house with a beautiful wife and you may ask yourself, well how did I get here? As much as I complained about the parts of the home I thought needed fixing or were not perfect, I did love my last home.  Seeing pictures now allows me to see it for what it was and how others might have percieved my home.

And for the second time in 2011we  moved the business again, this time half of it came with us 2 1/2 hours away and the other parts stayed in the Bay Area.  Not the best situation to have manufacturing and shipping separate - but it worked.  Leaner and meaner I say, or I just accepted it and moved on.  Getting the new studio situated and decorated here has been.....challenging.  Moving a home was one thing, moving a business at the same time was tough.

We Moved to Far, Far & Away

The farthest move I ever did was a junior in college to the SJSU dorms.  A mere 45 minutes away is not what I would call really living far away from home.  Heck, I came home every weekend for a good meal and to wash clothes.  This last move made it a little harder to run home for some comfort food.

Okay so 2.5 hours away and a new zip code is not that far away, but it might has well have been.  It felt like we moved to a different planet as far as I was concerned.   Just navigating myself out of our neighborhood was a challenge.  Finding new doctors, dentists, a vet, all exhausting excursions for this gal.  I hate to admit it, but I did take a few dips into my own pity party pool this past fall.  I am done with that though and am not going swimming for a long time.

Made New Friends But Ket the Old 

I was an old kindergartner, having been born right at the cut off I was almost six when I started, and I was ready for school.  The first day of school I marched up to a tall girl with a pageboy hair cut and a dress and said, "Do you want to be my friend?"  Luckily she said yes, and even if we don't see each other as often, we are still friends.  I wish making friends this time around was that easy.

I made some great friends and look forward to making more.  However, my olden-golden friends have gotten me through some super tough times and I will NEVER forget them.  I tried my damn-dest to keep in touch with all of them in 2011 and see them as much as possible.  I read a study last year that talked about what made men and women live longer.  For a man it said to get married, for a woman - have lots of friends.  Ya, I got that. 

Raising a Twelve Year Old Boy

 I remember twelve years old being one of the worst years of my life.  I was a sixth grader and I was miserable.  My hairstyle alone brings back horrible memories from that year.  I can remember not knowing where I fit in or who I was supposed to be or act like.  I was not a cool stoner that smoked cigarettes in the girl's bathroom, wore a leather jacket and kissed boys.  I was tiny, bookish and very uncomfortable in my own skin.  I try and remember this when dealing with my own twelve year old. 

Oh.My.Gawd...the changes we have had to deal with.  My sweet, soft spoken well read almost always polite son has changed.  He is a surley, back talking, eye rolling, video game playing skinny jean wearing stinky BOY.  The best part was when I was talking to my mother on the phone about how bad his back talking was and I claimed to NEVER recall acting like that.  She laughed so hard she dropped the phone and had to be practically revived to finish our conversation.

Typing texting and Carpel Tunnel....Oh my!  

I had that dull ache in both of my wrists for the second half of 2011 .   I used my hands to type, to paint, to to ribbon, to move boxes, to gift wrap, cooking....you name it, I was using my wrists.  I don't ever remember having my wrists hurt so bad for so long. I had to totally change my work habits, my work days and the way I work.  I was even put on "Don't Use Your Wrists" lock down by my husband (he even made me get off Facebook).

2011 Gone but Not Forgotten

So there you go 2011 is over.   It was not as exciting or eventful as some years, but it will go down as a very memorable one.  One year that had some pretty huge life changes for me.  I am sure it won't be the last time my world is turned upside down, but I am hoping 2012 will be calmer and more stable.  Considering we rang in the new year with old friends and new friends and laughter  I am most positive 2012 will be good!

Advice I Should Know Regarding Moving

October 10, 2011

Moving is not for the faint of heart, nor the easily emotional cry baby mess....not that I would know anything about the latter, but I have heard.  To be clear I am not talking about moving from one city to another, going away to college or moving out of your apartment to a new home....I am talking about moving with a capital M.  Moving one, two hours or 3 states away from your home - now that my friend is real moving.

Anywhere you can not get to within 15 minutes is not really moving.  Whether you agree or disagree with me, moving is a difficult pill to swallow and a big change for children, adults and pets....okay, not really pets, but adults for sure, and possibly children.  To quote a good friend when I told her we were moving she said, "I never meant I did not think you would not sell your house, I just never thought you would really move."  Her and me both.

When I agreed, or as my husband recalls it insisted we move this year instead of next,  I had the biggest rosiest glasses on you can ever imagine.  I just assumed it would be one big fat exciting adventure and I would be welcomed with big arms, a picnic, a parade and neighbors begging to have us for dinner....okay, maybe not the parade, but I thought it would be a big love fest.  

Also, I did think it would be the best, best, bestest thing to ever happen to the Lentzner clan.  Which reminds me of that quote that I now get, "If you want to make God laugh....tell him your plans".  I am guessing the big guy up in the sky has been laughing it up pretty good since I relocated my life, my family , my home and my business to El Dorado Hills.  Shame on me, I was the one who scoffed those with a birth plan, knowing that was just a crock.  I should have known better....really I should have.

Now moving the business has not been as hard as I originally thought it would be.  It has had a few hiccups (line NOT transferred to new area code for 30 days) and a few snafus (checks mailed to wrong address) but it has been easier than expected.  Taking on extra responsibilities until we hire employees has kept me busy and more involved in the day to day operations of Jamie's Painting & Design.  It has probably kept me more sane than I care to admit.

So, if you are in the mood or market to move, here are a few easy things to help anyone that is moving their life, children, pets....oh and their business:

Change is Not Easy....and Not for Wimps

Have you ever woken up day after day confused, disoriented and not sure where you were?  Have you ever repeatedly gotten lost just coming home from the grocery store?   The only thing I can compare it to is waking up into a dorm room 3 or 4 days after moving in and you can not stop signing that Talking Head song...."and you wake up with a beautiful house, with a beautiful wife and you ask yourself, how did I get here?"  No?...then you have not moved.  

I will be the first to acknowledge once again that this move was one of the most impulsive things I have ever done in my entire life.  As hard as it has been on me, it has been super easy on my kids.  Never, ever underestimate how easily your children will adopt to change....really, really trust me on this one.  I did not trust friends, family and strangers....children can adapt way easier than any adult.

Make New Friends, But Keep the Old

Being an ex-girl scout, and ex-sorority girl and an ex-Foster City native this one is crucial to your sanity.  Don't lose site of who matters and who has been there for you.  Not to say that there are probably a few acquaintances and friends that you will not keep in touch with, for the most part make the effort.  These are the people that know you for who you are, knew you back when...they will always understand who you are before you moved.

On that note it will be shocking who keeps in touch and who does not.  It will also be shocking how you have affected friends and how the hole you left will be very hard to fill.  I would suggest you do your very best to keep these people in your fold, find every way you can to make sure that even though the friendship changes....it never ends.

Being a creature of, well I would say comfort, but that is not what I am.  I am more a creature of comfort with my friends.  I love, love my girlfriends close, far, Facebook, High school, Grammar School....I love me some friends.  So, keeping them once you move can be challenging - but I highly recommend you do everything you can to keep them.  Because, for me I would be nothing without them.

Don't Be Dissapointed, Be Patient

Face it, people will disappoint you and things will happen in your personal life and your work life that do not make sense.  If you are in the midst of a major life change....then I suggest you let it go.  This is not easy, trust me and I am not an expert, nor have I let certain things go.  However, I have learned to live within the moment and realize that it is just life.

Last weekend my sister and Aunt came to visit and we had a great time.  We laughed, we shopped and we wine tasted.  It is always fun with my relatives, and this time was no different.  However my Aunt did put life in perspective for me.  She bought me a bottle of perfume and left it in my bathroom with this message written on a post it for me:

Jamie

Remember you are learning patience

I love you

Sheshi  (then she added a little cat face that she loves to do & I can't do on the computer) 

I also like to have things done quickly, like an HGTV makeover show.  Or better yet an episode of Extreme Home Make Over or any of those shows that works fast.   Nothing goes that quickly in real life....nothing.  So when I am down or sad I just think of this little simple post it my Aunt left me and I smile and I try to stay patient.

Moving, Moving....Moved

August 22, 2011

I have been thinking about this post for a long time and I had it all planned out as to what I would say, what photos I would show and how in control I would be.  This post, however will not be as I imagined.  First off I broke my camera and the two I borrowed are still packed in some box.  And, this is sort of like all my pregnant friends that spent hours on their "Birth Plans" expecting their labor to turn out like they wanted it to. I have found that life is never what we expect it to be.  I never believed in a Birth Plan myself, it was sort of like if I wrote how I would like it go, I assumed that it would go exactly the opposite.  Murphy's Law and me we got a good thing going and things pretty much never turn out the way I expect it to.  Not to say that it usually works out in the wrong long term, but I laugh at the people that have their life all mapped out.  I don't think life can be mapped out, no matter how hard I still try to map it out.  Hell, I have recently been  forced to accept the fact that I can't even use maps very well.

Moving Out of My Comfort Zone

So, here it is I moved and not just around the block or to the next town over.  I moved 2 1/2 hours away to a whole new area code and a whole new lifestyle.  This from the girl that was never leaving the Bay Area, the girl who rolled her eyes at others that left and always swore I was staying put no matter what.  Well guess what?  No matter what or a specific matter came a calling and made me look at a number of things and I had to eat crow and put my tail between my legs and say to people, "Never say never."  

My family and I moved and my business is moving up in two days.  We put the business on vacation for two weeks to hopefully get me situated and now I am supposed to be ready for it to come to me.  My few remaining employees will be staying in the Bay Area as I prepare for the holidays alone, possibly hiring one employee to help me out.  Manufacturing will stay in the Bay Area for the time being and we will work within our means to keep our customers happy.

The space we have for the business is good sized and it will hopefully be able to grow back to where it was in the pre-recession days.  I am almost nine years into this adventure and I am thinking that whatever happens, then that was what was supposed to happen.  I no longer subscribe to the Self Help Books, the Seminars or the quick fix to getting your business successful bullsh*t.  Not that there is anything wrong with that, but it means nothing to me.  If we grow big again, then great, if we don't then so be it.  Life is too short for me to spend 14 hours of each day obsessing on my business.  My children are growing, people I love have left me or left this world entirely.  It is only a company and this is only a job.  I still love what I do, but I no longer let it run my life.  

 Moving Sucks

One of the other reasons for not blogging was that I could not put into words how much moving has affected me.  Leaving an area I lived for almost 42 years of my life was harder than I ever thought it would be.  I know people that have moved some 32 times in their lifetimes and others that move every two years for work - but that is not me.  I was settled, I was a local girl and I loved where I lived.  Let me rephrase that, I loved the people that lived near me.   I still love those people and even after two short weeks, I so do miss them.

I talked a good game to friends and family, always touching on all of the positive points about the move and focussing on what we would gain, instead of what we would lose.  I only teared up a few times in public or in front of my immediate family.  I kept those dark sad times for when I was alone and I cried about who I would miss, I cried for my children and I cried about the unknown.   I let myself be sad for the changes and I still get choked up once in awhile here in our new home. 

Except, whenever my children would cry or express their fears I shut it down, way down.  I was able to not cry and talk them through their rough times.  Something deep down in the Mommy that I am, I kept it together for them.  I had dogs with explosive diareahea from the stress of the move, I had family members that were hysterical and I had friends made me cry just by a simple text about how they would miss us.  I am not made of steel, nor do I pretend to be.  I just forced myself to be "in the moment" and look ahead and not behind. 

We Moved in, but not Settled In

It has been two weeks since we moved into our  home and in my crazy world I would think we would be settled and calm.  This is far from the truth.  The garage is still full of boxes and no one can figure out where I put the bowls for breakfast (for the seventh time they are in the center island!).  We have had workers here every day and we have found that movers are a very interesting creative bunch that will wrap your my china in my son's bedding....not kidding.  I have also  found that getting lost in a strange town is not that bad.   For the most part strangers can be very friendly.  It is humbling to rely on the kindness of strangers when you just need a fly swatter.

I spent months second guessing myself and I wondered if this was really the right decision for our family.  I agonized over if this was right for our family or was it the right time to move.  Right before we moved a friend said something to me that made me thing we had made the right decision; "You actually did it.  You did what we all talk about doing some day.  You really did it.  I can't believe you made the decision and you stuck with it.  Good for you and good luck." 

 

This is Who We Are

I graduated college in the Fall of 1993, but I did not go through graduation ceremony till Spring of 1994.  I literally moved home the day after taking finals - such a rush I was in to leave behind my college days, and especially my sorority days.    I had been in college for 5 1/2 years and away at school for 3 1/2 of those years.  Home was only about 45 minutes away, but it was a world away from the life I had been living for so many years.

As my father kept telling me I had to get a J.O.B (ya, he said it like that, over and over again) and pay off my student loan as soon as possible.  Moving  home and job hunting was my only option.  Having left a large number of my very close friends to move home, I found myself lost and sad to not see my college friends on a daily basis.  Hell, I lived in the sorority house with about 40 other women.  I had spent most of the last 3 years with them every day.   I was sad that some of the friendships just died and went away as soon as I drove away.  It was like a really bad break up with out the constant dwelling of, "How he done me so wrong?" with my close girlfriends.  I was perplexed and I.....oh, I don't  know may have (may still) obsessed over it.....a tad.

Friends For A Time & A Reason

Lucky for me I tended to solve all my problems back then with self help articles in Women's Magazines, like Cosmopolitan.  I could always take the Is He The One Test (he so was not), or Do Guys Like Short Hair or Long Hair Better? (I was sad to learn long hair....and started growing mine out immediatley) quiz.  One weekned, while sunbathing (yes, I used to do that way back in the day....don't judge!) in my backyard I read an article that actually resonated with me.  One that helped me with my obsession about my sudden loss or dis-interest of friends.

The article talked about how you would meet friends at all different times of your life, and how they could affect you in all different ways.  Some friends would come back in and out of your life at monumental times, and they would always be your friends.  It would be as if they never left your side.  Never would you have to reaquaint yourselves, you would just slide right back into that comfortable place, like an old pair of slippers or jeans that you forgot you had.  It would be as if only days , not decades had put themselves between you and your friend.

Some friends would be with you through your entire lifetime, never leaving your side.  Whether
you met them in grammar school, high school or college - these girls were there for the long  haul. No matter the miles, the lifestyle changes or the  many obstacles thrown in your way - these girls were going to be with you forever.  Through every milestone, every heartbreak, every death and every life lesson, they had your back.  If I were still a girl scout I would call these my Gold Friends (and if you were not a girl scout, the song goes like this:

Make new friends, but keep the old.  One is silver, and the other is gold

Yet others,  would only be friends for a specific time in your life.  They were there for one event, maybe one year, possibly just one month.  They would come in and out of your life like a storm or a cool summer breeze.  Most likely they would never return.  They were there for a reason, and then they left.  The article went on to explain that this was just a mild blip in our lives and to accept these friends for who they were and what they meant to us.  We....okay me, or I was forced to realize and accept some friends were not forever, they were there for a specific reason or just a season in my life.  

Being a person that craves, dare I say demands (ask a few ex-boyfriends) closure at the end of a relationship, this was a tad hard to swallow.  But, swallow I did and I learned to accept it.  Since reading that article, I have probably read hundreds if not thousands of articles about romance, friends, parenting and the ever popular - aging.  Most don't stay in my brain long enough for me to digest what it was about.  But that article , seventeen years ago (see I can do math) really stuck with me.  I was forced to acknowledge that  pretty recently. 

Old Friends Have Great Memories

This past weekend I was lucky enough to spend an entire weekend with a large handful (if I had eight fingers) with some of those friends I so missed after leaving college.   These are friends that I have had for twenty of so years.  We get together, sometimes a few times a year, other times we don't speak for years.   This year, we crammed in about much fun as possible in the two days we spent together.

I feel it is important to stay friends with some people that knew me way back when, friends that
knew me before I was an adult, a parent, responsible (okay maybe not that one)....middle aged.  I feel it relative to keep them around me, and I adore them.  Sometimes I do not want to be reminded of who I was or who I have become - but they insist on reminding me.  Old friends call me out, they roll their eyes and point out what I won't.  At the end of the day (or a long weekend) I sort of love that.

So, I get it ladies - I promise to Let it Go, even without the closure I so crave. Which makes me think I would like to end with the best quote EVER.  In the in the 9th episode of Big Love, Alby said something profound to his sister Nikki (after he decided to NOT kill her of course). Alby touched Nicki's collar and said, "This is who we are, this is who we will always be".

New York Times Baby

As I mentioned in my last post I had the good fortune of being interviewed by the frickin' New York Times a few weeks ago.   And, then the misfortune of the photographer coming to photograph me for the piece.  It went live last night and I was able to post it on Twitter and Facebook.  Most everyone was very positive and gave me major props.   If you read all the way through you will see my good friend Jennifer Christensen (she was my inspiration for saying NO) interviewed also.

So this morning I did go rush out and purchase one, okay three copies of the paper.  I kept singing the old "Cover of Rolling Stone" all day today.  I thought it was funny....my kids not so much.  My new nickname around school is Jamie "No I'm Not" Lentzner.  I heard that the article was passed around a lot today around some Bay Area schools, amongst volunteers, PTA boards and us ex-volunteers who were happy to NOT be at school.  You can read the article here:

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Frazzled Moms Push Back Against Volunteering

Drew Kelly for The New York Times

Jamie Lentzner, of Foster City, Calif., feeling overwhelmed, put an end to her school volunteering.

By HILARY STOUT

Published: December 1, 2010

IT was last spring, somewhere between overseeing Teacher Appreciation Week and planning the fifth-grade graduation party, when Jamie Lentzner, mother of two in Foster City, Calif., reached her breaking point. 

She had already designed the fifth-grade T-shirt, taught art twice monthly to three different classes, and organized movie night, restaurant night and beach night fund-raisers. She was overscheduled and exhausted. She had scant time to help her children with their school projects because — coincidentally — she was always working on projects for their school. “You’ve got to stop,” said her husband, Darin, who worried that the constant stress she seemed to feel was damaging to her health.

Ms. Lentzner realized that she had spiraled out of control. She vowed to put an end to all this volunteering — and to recapture some of the serenity in her family life that had vanished because of nothing more than a well-intentioned desire to pitch in.

Today, more than three months into the school year, Ms. Lentzner is a new woman. She has yet to attend a PTA meeting or decorate so much as a classroom doorknob. When she saw her name listed as chairwoman of the annual Donuts for Dads Day (another event she oversaw last year) on a volunteer sign-up sheet, she whipped out a Sharpie and crossed it out.

“No, I’m not,” she wrote.

Her business — she designs children’s room décor — improved, and at home, the change has been striking. She has time to play Ping-Pong and Wii with the children. She hosted 27 relatives and friends for Thanksgiving last week, and for the first time in years she enjoyed the holiday. “I told my husband, ‘I am not stressed,’ “ she said. “I did not have some event hanging over my head, or a T-shirt design that had to be done. I think I finally have my priorities in the right place.”

Around the country there are a number of altruistic, devoted and totally burned-out mothers just like Ms. Lentzner who are becoming emboldened to push back against the relentless requests from their children’s schools for their time. What started out as an admirable civic gesture somehow snowballed into an inability to say no to any committee assignment or project request, and spiraled into night, weekend and after-school commitments, middle-of-the-night e-mail exchanges, as well as frozen dinners, takeout pizza and baby sitters at home.

With the holidays approaching, the call for parental help at school has reached a fever pitch, but this demand is not just seasonal. As local and state economies continue to struggle, budget cuts to rich and poor school systems are increasing the reliance on unpaid parent help. The need is so great that some school districts, like a couple of specialty schools in Prince William County, Va., have made it mandatory to commit to a small amount of volunteer time, and others are considering it. In San Jose, Calif., one elementary school district has been discussing a proposal that the families of its 13,000 students commit to 30 hours of volunteer work during the year.

Many parents are happy to volunteer uncoerced, and most everyone recognizes the worthiness of the cause. But the heightened need and expectations are coming at a time when many parents have less and less time to give.

“Volunteerism is way down at our school this year,” said Gary Parkes, the PTA president at Carmel Elementary School in Woodstock, Ga., a suburb of Atlanta. At the school’s recent annual fall festival some games had to be closed down because of a lack of adult volunteer supervisors.

Economic necessity, Mr. Parkes said, has forced some stay-at-home mothers to go back to work. “People are so busy trying to stay afloat, they just do not have as much time as they would like to give,” Mr. Parkes said, adding that he has heard similar laments in regional PTA meetings. “This seems to be a problem for a lot of schools.”

(Mr. Parkes has been getting creative. He reached out to the Cub Scouts to help with the fall festival and recruited the girls’ lacrosse team at the high school to operate the crazy-hair and face-painting stations. He is also exploring arrangements with the R.O.T.C. and with corporations that have public service programs.) 

Other forces are at work besides the lack of free time. The growing world of mom blogging has provided ample forums for exposing the darker feelings of motherhood, and a number of women have taken to cyberspace to gripe about school volunteer work. Some complain that the system preys on maternal guilt and that it creates a sense that a mother’s worthiness is measured in how many hours she puts in at her children’s schools. Under the headline “Just Say NO to Volunteering,” Sarah Auerswald, a former PTA president in Los Angeles, wrote in June, “What I am about to say is not very PC, so get ready: Moms, stop volunteering so much.”

Ms. Auerswald, who estimated that she had sat through 1,000 meetings over the last 10 years as a volunteer, said all her work for the schools had left her “a run-down, crabby, resentful wreck.” Worse, she said in an interview, “My kids got really resentful.” When she would leave them with yet another baby sitter, or drag them along for yet another Saturday Clean-up Day at school, they implored, “Why is it always you who has to do everything, Mom?”

Ms. Auerswald emphasized that her children’s school had a very real need for parents’ volunteer work. But she said she has learned that parents need to set realistic expectations about what they can accomplish and how much of themselves they can give.

Because the work is unpaid, some volunteers say, few realize the toll it can take on people. “I know a woman — the work she did for the public schools was so critical — she made me look like a loafer,” Ms. Auerswald said. “Then her husband left her because she was never home.”

That news was startling to Ms. Auerswald. “Not that my husband was leaving, luckily,” she said, “but he was not happy about how much I was doing.”

Part of the burnout stems from the fact that in most schools a small number of volunteers shoulder the vast majority of the work.

Everyone recognizes this, but they can’t help but wring every ounce of commitment out of those who seem willing. Consider the case of Zan Jones.

Ms. Jones is a mother of two in Keller, Tex., who works part time as a booking manager for professional speakers. This fall she was co-chairwoman of the Scholastic Book Fair, a commitment of five full days on top of the multiple meetings required to organize the event. And the decorating.

This year’s theme was superheros, so Ms. Jones made the sign with Superman saying, “It’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s a book fair!” She made tall buildings out of cardboard boxes. She stuffed the Spider-Man costume that she had found and bought herself. When it was over, she helped pack everything up and take the money to the bank.

That’s a lot of work — especially since her children don’t go to the school anymore.

Near the end of the summer, Ms. Jones’s children, a third grader and a fifth grader, were accepted to a charter school, but she felt uneasy about breaking volunteer commitments she had made to their old school. And, apparently, the school was desperate for help.

“They were panicked,” Ms. Jones said. “There was not one mention of ‘Oh, don’t worry about it.’ If there was, I probably would have taken it and run with it.”

Still, Ms. Jones insisted that she was happy to help, and no sooner did she fulfill her commitments at the old school than she started volunteering at the new one. She has chaperoned three field trips, worked in the library and helped set up a “mad scientist” dry ice center for a Halloween party. But she admitted she considered bowing out.

“Selfishly, I thought, ‘Oh my God, this is my chance for a clean break,’ ” she said. “I thought, ‘I can go somewhere where no one knows me, and I can sit silently under the radar and not volunteer.’ ”

But, she explained: “My kids really like me volunteering. Their faces light up when I’m there.”

That is what most parents assume — that school volunteer work is in the best interests of their children. But some veterans are skeptical. Jen Christensen’s epiphany came on her 41st birthday in May 2009. She was presiding over Teacher Appreciation Week at her children’s school in San Mateo, Calif., and getting up daily at 4 a.m. to work on the school auction. She was so overcommitted, she said, that she could not find time to celebrate.

What hit harder still was that she had given up working when she had children to be home with them — and now she was continually leaving them with baby sitters because she had to attend a meeting at school.

The next fall, Ms. Christensen declared herself off-limits to all school volunteer requests. “I said: ‘I’m done. I quit. Don’t call. Don’t e-mail.’ I said I have given so much of myself. I’m spending 50 hours a week working on a volunteer position. Where does it end? You want some blood? I wouldn’t even let my husband write a check.”

Ms. Christensen added: “It felt fabulous. I took a step back and was able to see what was wrong and appreciate the opportunity I have. I don’t have to work, and being able to spend time with my kids is what my job really should be.”

She noted the simple pleasure of reading with her 8-year-old son, Owen, in their special “reading chair.”

“It was calmer in our home and I think everyone was much happier,” she said.

Some of the push-back stems from just plain irritation over the way volunteer requests are made, often involving large numbers of increasingly desperate-sounding e-mails. A few years ago, Karen Bantuveris was on a plane on a business trip. “I looked down and literally saw my BlackBerry fill up with reply-all e-mails about whose turn it is to help at recess and to bring snacks,” she said. “The more I talked to working moms, the more I heard: ‘I can’t volunteer anymore. This is ridiculous.’ ”

Ms. Bantuveris put her training as a management consultant to work. She invented an online system — similar to the popular Evite invitation service — that sends a calendar of volunteer opportunities and allows parents to sign up for those of their choosing without multiple e-mail exchanges. She now runs a company called VolunteerSpot that markets the system, coordinating 460,000 volunteers, 75 percent of them parents in schools.

Even among those who have made the break from volunteering, there is always guilt. “There is such a need,” Ms. Christensen said. Her year of saying “No” ended when school started this year. But still she is a far cry from her old über-volunteer self.

She agreed to be a “room parent” for the third grade, which means she plans class parties. And she did consent to oversee the kitchen-tour fund-raiser, but she is now “kind of regretting it.” It is scheduled for September 2011, Ms. Christensen said, noting, “I still have time to get out of it.”

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So that is that, I was in the New York Times.  I can scratch it off my bucket list (I don't have one but if I did I would put be in the New York Times on it).  Once I get on the Oprah Winfrey Show (you did not think I would not reference her did you?  I only have till September 2011) and my products in People Magazine I can say I have done everything.  Everything as far as publicity goes that is.

Ladies Don't Start a Business, Just Have Babies?

I read a blog post yesterday that really made me think about what it took to own/start a business.  Penelope Trunk, founder of Brazen Careerist wrote a post on Tech Crunch titled, Women Don't Want to Run Startups Because They'd Rather Have Children.  In the post she touches on many broad points and makes tons of assumptions about women entrepreneurs and mother's that own their own businesses.   She does this of course AFTER she has decided to pretty much take a step way back and let other people run her third Start-up.   She is pretty much pointing her finger at VC backed Tech companies - but she makes some bold and assumed statements about female entrepreneurs. 

Here are the highlights, if you don't have the time (or stomach) to read it:

• Starting a business can be Hell
• Women are under pressure to have kids - they have biological clocks
• Women don't want to give up their personal life in exchange for the next big Thing
• She won't even go there regarding women with young children that start a business
• She compares the stupid farms people build in Farmville to how Men and Women differ
• Women want a lifestyle business, so they can control their time, work & be flexible with raising kids

Just for the Hell of it, let me counter, question or decipher her points:

Starting a Business Is Hell

Yes, yes, yes sister  it sure can be Hell!  But uh, anyone in this day and age that does not know that has been living under a rock or is really lacking in the whole brain department.  I mean, gee thanks for starting the obvious.   I sort of loathe people that fail (and yes I know harsh words, but she did fail) at something and then tell everyone else NOT to do it.  It is demoralizing and patronizing.  I mean she is right about the whole starting a business is hell....but it is also a hell of a good time.  Those first two years for me  were mostly exciting, amazing and exhilarating.  Everything was so new and so much fun.  I was Leo DiCaprio in The Titanic, "I'm on top of the world!"

Women Are Under Pressure to Have Kids - Due to Their Biological Clocks

What?  Really? Is it real? No, it is not it was actually conceived as a metaphor for the sense of urgency some women feel regarding reaching menopause, being childless or arriving at her thirties unmarried and without a suitor.  We don't really have the biological clocks - but some of us do have the need, want and desire to have children.  I don't like the fact that she lumps all women into this nice little decisive statement.  Even though I am not who she is talking about, since I started my business after I threw the damn clock away.  I already had my children....then I started the business thank you very much.

Women Don't want to Give Up Personal life for the Next Big Thing

The funny thing is when I started Jamie's Painting & Design I thought, no I knew I was going to be the next big thing.     Okay not like Mark Zuckerberg or Bill Gates....but I was positive I was the next Rachel Ashwell or even Martha Stewart.  I had such conviction and an ego that was huge.  I could actually taste that desire for total world domination thing.  And, for those first few years I did give up a LOT of my personal life....a lot.  Our social card was empty, I worked while the children slept, I was  thinking and talking about my business all of the time (shout out to those friends that are still my friends....I must have been hell-a annoying back then).  It consumed me, like most entrepreneurs - I was obsessed with my baby.  But, back to her statement, it is so final and um broad reaching.  She, Penelope decided to quit.  She decided she wanted more of her personal and private family life.  I mean, she is even sort of snide saying that she wants to be the center of her family NOT her company.

The Impossibility of Starting a Business with Young Children

The crazy thing is she did this, her sons are young, she even says it in the article.  But, back to the fact that she did not succeed at it, soooooo no one else should try.  I did take offense to this part of the article since I was the one who did exactly that, but then I realized she has no idea who Jamie Lentzner is or what the hell to the L what  Jamie's Painting & Design does.  Since I am not going after VC money and I don't make some snazzy tech gadget...I am not that woman she is thumbing her nose at.  But, I still don't like the statement - so there.

Playing Farmville Shows the Differences Between Men & Women

I hate, hate, hate Farmville.  I never ever had the desire or time to play it.  I have seen it, I have watched it being played...and I don't get he attraction.  Maybe I am biased due to my total disregard and violent hatred of the game but still, I am not sure about her comparision.  She claims that women build colorful fun farms and men build big McManssion farms, proving that is why so few women pitch to Venture Capitalists and that even fewer get funding.  Okay?  So I say to her - what does my (if I had one) fancy farm have to do with me asking or not asking for money?  That means nothing to anyone.  I think it proves that these men spend way too much time on their computers and Facebook.  Or the men that built these huge farms are actually over compensating for something. 

Women Want a Life Style Business - To Control Their Life

Okay now I am thinking she is looking at me.  I have said this, wrote this, blogged this, cried this and screamed this.  I like the control, but doesn't everybody?  I have yet to meet a 40 something woman that did not like being in control of her own life.  We can't stay 3 forever people - we need to learn how to get dressed, earn a living and use the toilet.  Am I right?  I think men start their businesses for the same reasons - to control their own destiny.  Most uber successful entrepreneurs (I am thinking Donald Trump not Louie my Dry Cleaner) even have enormous egos and love being in control of their own lives.

But What Kind of Entrepreneur am I?

The post, as you can imagine got a ton of comments (482 at last count) and most were from women  with and without biological clocks screaming at her.  When I first read it I did take it personally and got all, "Oh no she didn't...." and I wanted to write a nasty comment.  Then I read it a few more times and I was not as irritated as I sort of confused.  I mean, I agree with her on some parts of the article (that would be one part), but coming on the heels of deciding she can not and will not do it all, sort of sounds like sour grapes. 

I do know one thing, oh she is so not talking about me or  Jamie's Painting & Design.  She doesn't even know my name (see another Sixteen Candles reference...I think I will start slipping them into EVERY post from here on out).  She knows nothing about what I do, or other like-minded women in small industries do.  I tend to buy into the whole You can have it all, just not at the same time theory and my personal favorite quote, "Life is hard...deal with it".  But I also think that a woman should not be held back by a ill-concieved pretend biological clock, or her real biological children.....I am just sayin' from experience and all.

My Little Boy Grows Up

This post is actually very late - I should have put it up Fall of 2009 when my son's room was actually finished.  However, we had a few last touches that we finished this summer, and in my defense I tried.  Though, every time I wanted to photograph his room....it was a mess, or he had mis-matched sheets, or worse he was in it and refused to leave. 

Change is Good

I am not one to balk at change, I can handle a little change with my life.  I get it is part of life, I understand we all grow, we get our own ideas and we....change.  You would think with my son having no had less than 3 different room designs and decorated by me, I would be all gung-ho on this new venture.  Well, trust me I was excited.  I spear-headed the shopping spree to IKEA, the search for bedding that looked like soccer but was not a cheese-fest of bright colors.  I researched the posters, I experimented with having the room painted white, tan or cream.  I was into the decorating - I DID all the decorating.

Out with the Old

When the day came last year to dismantle his room, to actually pack up his sweet bedding, his model air planes and the hand made pillows my grandmother made him.....I got a bit weepy.  I wanted to save it all, and all I did save.  I kept much of his items because I could not bare to get rid of them.  It was like I was saying good bye to my Little boy and hello to a bigger, meaner and sometimes stinkier one.  He is not yet a man, or a teenager but a tween as he is often called.  The airplane room was his, and he loved it - but it was for a little boy.  This soccer, I mean Manchester United Room - was all him, and all his idea.  Don't get me wrong, I encouraged him and I wanted him to really help us, but it was defiantly his room.

For whatever reason last year when my husband went on his yearly boozefest golf trip my parents offered to watch the kids.  I was all alone on a Saturday night so I decided to paint my son's room.  As I quickly used primer over all of my airplanes I got even more melancholy.  I so wanted the room to stay the same, or as my therapist would say (if I had one) I wanted him to stay the same.  I got it, I get it still today....and yes, looking at that picture of his old rooms still makes me sad. 

Ah, such is life and I will keep living it.  I am usually one to embrace all of my children's milestones - but this painting time I was down right weepy.  Looking back, it probably did not help that we were having a major heat wave, it was 90 degrees inside and the first time I was home alone.  I would chalk it up to hormones but I was just a wee girl of 39 back then and pretty sure it was not menopause.

It is All Soccer Baby.....I mean older Boy!

This past June Grant just graduated fifth grade and is soon going to be entering junior high.  I figured this was a good time to show off his room.  I mean, if painting over a few airplanes brings me to tears, you can only imagine what I am like envisioning him in junior high.  I will try and keep my blubbering, my experience in junior high and my urge to kiss him in public at bay these days.  It was just a bedroom, right?

So, now almost a year later I am excited by his room, I am embracing him as he tells his friends about it and how he shows it off to his soccer team.  I like that he has taken ownership (and some of my credit) for his room.  Now, my husband and I are crossing our fingers this will be our LAST re-design of our son's room before he hits college.  And, at the same time we realize that Abby is going to start wanting a new room pretty soon......

This is What I Do

March 25, 2009.

I was really worried that my last post would piss off, or just upset some bloggers - truth is, it did nothing of the sort - I must be getting old and soft in my old age.  Many commented and emailed me to say "You Go Girl" and uh - good for you!  I still wanted to get this post out there though - just in case you had questions about what I did do all day....like all day (inside joke, my husband came home and asked me that one day when our son was a few months old, I stayed at home and it was the ONLY day that I left the house a mess....no he has never heard the end of it, at least we laugh about it now).

I Do Worry About My Business

This is my baby, I spend countless hours obsessing over the success and the failure of my business.  I try to always improve and I hope that everything we do is amazing.  However, this is not always the case - such is life.  I probably spend as much time worrying about my company as I do about my kids....okay not true (kids trump everything) but it seems that way some days.  No matter what it is I do, I always worry. 

I Do Try and Reply &  Help

I try to reply to all emails I get regarding running a business, this blog and comments on my blog.  Note I said I try, I do - but sometimes life has to take the front seat in my life.  My kids come first, my husband second, dogs third, business fourth, then let's see volunteering fourth, house is fifth - I mean I have a life.  If I do not respond lickity split it only means I am living my life.  I love, love the friends I have made from this blog and just meeting from email exchanges.  However, I can not always help - sometimes the questions are out of my expertise and sometimes I am just busy.  Please do not attack me or assume I don't care, I do care. 

I Do Have Feelings

Not so much from this blog, but more from the Silicon Valley Mom Blog I write for - I have been flamed.  I brought it on, no biggie.  I think people forget sometimes that a blog is about me - and my (totally skewed 'cause they are about me) opinions and experiences.  I only write about what I know or what I have been through.  I do not know everyone and I do not mean to offend - I just tell it how I see it (sorry is what it is).  I do not like to be yelled at, swearer at or even accused of being a bitch....and yes I may be one.  I think when someone can comment under Anonymous it opens up the flood gates - I am out there, if you want to comment - good.  However - I have a face and feelings and you may want to think before you push send.

I Do Screw Up

I have been around long enough to know that not every design (or product) is going to succeed.  I have even done some serious homework and research and then still had the product fail.  Sometimes it is the time, the market - or just dumb bad luck.  I do not know why some products or even themes fail - but they just do.  I have learned not to fall in love with my idea (or myself) too much so that when it fails I can let it go.  It helps to remove myself emotionally from the idea once it is 'out there in the market place'. 

I Do Struggle

I have grown, I have lost, I have survived.  Running a business is very hard, and yet rewarding at the same time.  I am finding it hard to stay positive in this Economy.  Retail is struggling - therefore I am struggling.  I keep running up against payment problems, bankruptcy and just bad accounting practices.  I get it - I understand what everyone is experiencing.  I have responsibilities to my employees and my channel partners and I will survive this downturn, I just do not know how long it will take.  I do think that doing whatever it takes (legally of course people) to stay alive is necessary.  I am not one to brag - but I am willing to take on any and every job at my office to ensure we do not go under...........oh and we are not going under.

I Do Get Lucky

Yep, I do sometimes - just happens.  I have had some amazing breaks and made some wonderful connections.  I work it though - all the time.  I make a connection with all accounts and I keep in touch with the press I do know.  I sometimes have a bluebird (sales expression) land in my lap - but most times it comes from lots of hard work.  I have been at the wrong place more times than the right place.  I make the time to make the calls, the emails and the connections - I have to.  I never know where that one introduction will get me. 

My mother used to say, "Every date is a possible mate."  I have my own expression with work and it goes like this, though not as poetic "Every person that knows about my company, is a possible sale, partnership or opportunity for me"

I Do Get It

For whatever reason this business has helped me and it has been a very steep learning curve.  Sometimes something (or someone) clicks with you - for me it was this business.  I am not an expert, nor do I pretend to know it all.  I do get what it takes to succeed and I think I have found my niche in the market place.  I feel that if I can weather this storm, any other one can not be this bad.  I love runningJamie's Painting & Design and I love creating new products - I really do.

I Do Need to Sleep

Ya, that is me speaking - the real me.  I am in desperate need of some sleep - like the sleep for three days sleep.  I am tired and I tend to burn the candle at both ends when it comes to my business (and my life).  I am always wishing I blogged more, read more blogs, created more products and contacted more accounts.  I have to learn to accept that I am one person and I am only human.  At the end of the day I am pretty sure my children (and husband) will not say, "Gee we wish Mommy worked harder at her job and spent less time with us."  So I am okay.....I think.*

*An apology to the blog Gods who say that every post needs a picture...truth is I have none.  I have about 40 new product ideas/designs yet not photographed.  I wanted to get this post up and I apologize for no eye-candy.  How about if next post is all photos???  Sound good?

I Don't Do That

March 16, 2008.

After not one but two different companies approaching me about pimping....er, I mean recommending their products on my blog I decided this post was a must.  I also had a very funny conversation today with another blogger about the things we had been asked to do from some readers...I figured it was time to say what I don't do.   I had to get it off my chest.  You know a "I don't do that...." speech, like the one in Sixteen Candles?  Anyone...anyone?  It went something like this:

Girl with pearls at Jake Ryan's party, "What? I'm sorry, I don't do that."

Friend with Jake Ryan's Mom's fur coat on, "Yes, you do."

Girl with pearls, "I know." [Giggling]
   
Caroline, Jake Ryan's girlfriend, sitting in hall with her hair shut in the door, "Come on.  Trace. You guys.                   

Caroline whining, "Would you help me,please?  Come on, you guys.  I'm your prom queen."

Am I the only one who remembers that speech?  Oh well, I am a Sixteen Candles Professional Movie buff.  I am not sure that it has done me any good in life - but that is what I am envisioning as I write this.  So, back to me and my list of things I don't do.  I am going to list them here in case anyone has any questions for me.  I will probably write my next post with things I do DO.  You know just so you don't think I am totally negative Nelly and all.*

*For the record, these are things I don't do now, today.  This does not mean I did not do them at one time or another.  Truth is I probably did most if not some of these things.  Okay?  Just not anymore........well not today, maybe I will do it again another day, doubtful, but maybe.

I Don't Hand Paint My Tiles

I used to do this, years and years ago in a galaxy far far away - well actually it was my garage/studio and it was forever ago - five years, oh wait six and almost a half.  No matter what it says all over the Internet, on multiple sites that sell my stuff, including a few interviews - I don't do that.  No, I use my hand painted designs, and they are mine, mine, mine!  I do all the designs, I do all the writing, the fonts - all me.  I created them.  We use another process to get the art on the tile - a better process than hand painting if you asked me. 

I Don't Do Everything

I know it seems sometimes like I do, and I can look like the muli-tasker maven at times - but I am not.  I have help and the most supportive, wonderful husband on the planet - sorry ladies he is taken.  I have my parents that help with the kids and in the business.  I have employees, I have cleaning people and a gardener.  I do try and do it all, I do try and make it look easy - but I could not and would not have ever succeeded (or been sane) without the help I get.  What I do do - I don't always do well either.  I screw up, I fall down, I make mistakes, I cry, I yell - I am human.  I am happy when someone tells me I am an inspiration, but I put my pants on one leg at a time also - and I clean the toilets too.

I Don't Work out of My Home

I am not a WAHM, I have an office, manufacturing, shipping department.  These days with the Economy so bad not to say I don't wish some days it was still run out of my home.  But, I am able to leave work at work.  I do have a studio in my home, I do paint from home and do some work from home sometimes.  I am still lumped into that WAHM in some newsletters and on some threads - I don't do that any longer (not that there is anything wrong with that).

I Don't Have a Million Dollars

No matter how many times I say this, or how many upset/angry sales channels claim I a "big time" now or the "you are soooo successful speech" I have to disagree.  Just because I put on a good show, got some press and have an office space does not mean I am rich.  I live in one of the most expensive states in the country - not because I am rich either.  I live here because I love it here, my family is here and well it is what it is.  I am not making a huge salary either.  I shop at Target, my kids get jeans at Old Navy, I love a bargain and the word caviar is not in my vocabulary.  I like to tell people just because you work at home or are a small business, does not mean you have to act small.  Being professional, consistent and easy to work with have nothing to do with making tons of money - it has everything to do with being a smart business woman.

I Don't Do Mommy Blogger Product Reviews

I do not review other products, I never have and I never will.  I am pretty sure about this one because I think my readers would scream fowl if I ever tried to sell them a fabulous scrap booking eggshell cutter.  Pssst....I don't even scrapbook for that matter - did it too much in college - I will scrapbook when I die, or retire - whichever comes first.  I do get emails and phone calls about companies saying they love my blog and hey shouldn't I, couldn't I and wouldn't I write a post about ____________ (you fill in the blank).  The answer is no.  And now I can send them to this post instead of the snarky/sarcastic answer I usually give them. 

I Don't Send My Products to be Reviewed by Mommy Bloggers

This one is a tough one and before you yell at me.....please read on.  I am not going to send my products to a blog to be reviewed any longer.  I will send products to a magazine a newspaper or a TV Show, because they send it back.  I have done review blogs in the past.  I did a few, got no hits and no sales - no biggie, it was a little bit of press.

 I have had my business for many, many years and I work with the best in the industry, not to mention a few celebrities that have my products.  I do feel it is good to see the product and know the quality, however real press outlets do not order tiles with specific names and themes on them.  I used to send out products willy-nilly.  And then this happened:

I followed up on a query from a sort of well known blog for cowboy products.  Got a request for photos and to send a Cowboy Name Plaque for her son.  I made it, I personalized it, I shipped and I followed up with an email....I paid for it, oh I paid for it. 

This was before Christmas, you know about the time the Economy and my sales took a flying leap off the cliff?  You remember when my sales were so low I wanted to cry??  Remember?  Well, I know from Fed Ex ('cause I am smart like that and can track things) that the plaque was received.  I sent emails to confirm she received it - no response.  I asked if my product would still be reviewed - no comment.  I even commented on her blog - no response....oh wait that is not right she deleted my comment right after I left it.   

I don't care if she hated my product, I don't care if maybe Fed Ex screwed up and she did not get it (I mean possible, doubtful but possible).  What I care about is the non-response.  She got a free product from me.  I don't send out free products to just anyone.........Oprah yes - a blogger NO.  She should say thanks but no thanks, or I hated it so I won't review it, I never got it, or better yet na-na-na-na I got a free product.  Something, anything........

Ya, well get a free product from me once, and then the whole Ponzi Scheme is ruined for everyone. I do not agree with bloggers getting tons of free product.  I do not think it is right.  They are not professional journalist no matter how many readers or comments they have.  I mean I want to yell out - really?  I am guessing she thinks I won't call foul, or that I won't tell others.  Worse yet um, I may not set the world on fire with my blog but come on - I have been in business for 6 years!  I must be doing something right?*

*Please don't ask who it was, read between the lines, figure it out if you can.  I won't tell.....well maybe I will, I have trouble keeping my mouth shut.  Dang I am full of contradictions today.  I just say to be very, very careful when sending out products to be reviewed. 

I Don't Care......Okay, Maybe a Little

I don't care if you don't like my blog, I do not care if you hate my honesty, or the negative energy I sometimes bring to the table.  I am going to do it and I am going to tell it as it is.  This does not mean I do not have wonderful, fabulous and amazing days, but after all these years doin' what I do - some days are just crummy.  I do write about both by the way.  Running a business is hard and if can't stand the fire.....yep, get out of the kitchen. 

I don't.......well okay wait I really DO care about what you think, and I do care if you like the blog.  I do want comments, I do enjoy the banter, even when readers disagree.  I do like the emails and I do hope I make ya laugh.  However I don't and won't be changing my tune anytime soon. 

I Don't Mind if You Ask Questions

I don't mind at all if you ask me anything about my business.  Really, really I enjoy the conversation and if I can help - you know I will.  I  may not be able to answer all questions and I am not going to give away all secrets, but I will do what I can to help.  Some things in life you do need to figure out on your own.  As my mother told me, as I am sure others did too - sometimes you need to fail before you can succeed.  There is no easy way, there is no magic secret and there is nothing wrong with asking.  So, do go ahead - and ask....I don't mind.